Wendy's favorite quotes

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."— Dr. Seuss

Monday, May 10, 2010

Make the Time

I've heard it said that if we are "too busy", then the real issue is a matter priority, not time.

As an aspiring writer, I strive to write, read, edit, work on submissions, and learn more about the publishing industry every day.

As a farmer, I've weeds to pull, plants to water, roadsides to burn, thistles to spray, and customers to help every day.

As a mother of 5 (ages 11-2), I've diapers to change, homework to correct, scrapes to clean...all the many duties that children bring into our lives...every day.

The house... The husband...  The school...

I'm a writer, a maid, a farmer, a wife, a mother, a PTO volunteer, a cook, a taxi...

Are you tired yet? I am.

This past week I noticed my kids were getting a little out of sorts with each other, and yesterday I realized that I was the reason behind it. I’ve had such a heavy workload the last few weeks that I had put my many duties higher on the priority list than my kids. I was still with them of course, but I was focused on all the work we were doing, not on the kids themselves.

So, today I did my darndest to finish all jobs I had to do while they were at school so that when they came home, I could give them my full attention. Farming, housework, and even writing took a backseat to the most important people in my world, and my world is brighter because of it.

We made brownies, we sang, we laughed, we chased each other around just for fun. And the result? My kids are refreshed. I feel more connected and grounded. And the crazy part is, I feel more energized to do all the dull jobs that I put on the bottom of the priority list.

I think the lesson is that I was trying to pull water from an empty well. It's not enough to exist, work, and care for the physical needs of my children; I need to nurture the joy in their lives. Why? Because when I bring joy and laughter into their lives, it feeds my soul.

This is a lesson I have to learn—and relearn—whenever the balance in my life gets out of whack.

What about you? What feeds your soul? Is there something important that you have to remind yourself to make time for?


Renee Miller said...

I'm the same, Wendy. Now and then my priorities get scrambled and the need to push forward and 'succeed' overshadows what will matter most when the day is done. My kids. The good thing is that Diva Kennedy doesn't let that happen for long.

MT said...

Nice post. :) I often get stuck on life's tread mill and forget to take some time to enjoy my girls. This is a good reminder. Have a great day!

RaShelle said...

Hey Wendy,
My children could easily get left in the dust (along with the house) if I let them because they are at ages where they can do things for themselves. Luckily, we've all agreed that isn't allowed to happen.

Wendy Swore said...

Renee, MT, & Rashelle,

Thanks for stopping by! It's funny howwe have to remind ourselves as to what the priority is. You'd think after all these years of practice, we'd get it down!

I commend you for your dedication to your children.

Kim Coates said...

I struggle with this same thing. My children are still young, and require a lot of time. Time that I often neglect giving them. I work from home. I have church duties, housework, writing. It's a lot to handle, and I don't always get the priorities right. But I try every day to do better.

Anna said...

Isn't it funny how it can feel like we don't have time to spend with the people we care about, but that quality time actually gives us more energy for all those responsibilities? I've been so stressed in recent weeks that my husband and I haven't had much quality time to spend together, but last night (even though I had a bunch of work I was supposed to be doing) we went out to dinner and had a nice, fun evening together. I felt so much less stressed out today and had a much more productive day. I'll have to remember that next time I'm feeling so stressed!

Wendy Swore said...

Anna, You got it exactly.

Your blog is awesome by the way. I love finding new writing buddies. Thanks for stopping by. :)

Lani Woodland said...

I just posted a very similar blog! I finished my edit and looked around and realized how much I had been looking. Yesterday we spent the whole day as a family and played board games for hours. We all needed it.

Wendy Swore said...

Lani, awesome how playing with the kids recharges our batteries, isn't it.

Glad you took the time!

writermomof5 said...

Hi Wendy,

I loved this post. I think it's something all mothers deal with from time to time. I know too often I find myself directing the kids instead of spending time with them.

I set aside Thursday nights to just be with my kids. No TV, no phone calls or internet. We take turns chosing what to do and we all do it together. (Even if that means playing hide and seek or follow the leader.)

It's not always enough time, but I know it's there. : )

Wendy Swore said...

Writer momof5, That's a really good idea- kind of unplugging for a day. We may have to try that.

Do you go the whole entire day without any electronics or just that evening?